Shameless: Season 1, Episode 12: Top Lines

The detective talking to Lip:

D: “Phillip Gallagher … no relation to our favorite overnight guest Frank I hope?

L: “Son.”

D: “Your Frank’s kid and this is your first felony bust? Getting a little late start for a L: Gallagher aren’t you?”

L: “Slow study, I guess.”

Steve and his boss:

Boss: “What happened to you?”

Steve: “Pick-up hockey game.”

Boss: “What were you? The puck?”

Ethel siding with V who said Lip and Ian need a legit lawyer:

“She’s right, my husband’s public defender never even met Clyde before his arraignment then suggested he plead guilty to child molestation and sexual abuse.”

(Awkward silence from the room)

Debs returns to the Lischman's:

Mrs. L: “More cookies to sell?”

D: “Is Jimmy here?”

Mrs. L: “No, he’s back at school in Michigan.”

D: “No, he’s living 96 blocks away on the South Side, dating my sister, stealing cars, and going by the name of Steve.”

Fiona and Carl: 

F: “Carl go help Veronica with dinner”

C: “I helped with breakfast”

F: “You pulled out a cereal bowl.”

Lip and Fiona:

L: “Hey, Fiona … I’m gay.”

F: “I know.”

L: “I should have told you a long time ago, I don’t know why I didn’t.”

F: “You’re still on my shit list.”

Another Frank rant:

“Hannah Montana … those oversexed kids on Glee? Think they’re selling good wholesome all-American fun? Hell no – flesh and underage temptation! You can look, but oh no, you can’t touch!”

Steve offering Tony the house:

T: “You paid for the house in cash?”

S: “It’s a shitty neighborhood, I could’ve bought two”

T: “How many cars have you stolen?”

Carl and Fiona:

C: “You figure out what you’re going to do to them yet?”

F: “Huh?”

C: “Punishment? Ground them for a year?”

F: “Nothing, I’m not their mother.”

C: “So, I can steal a car and nothing will happen to me?”

F: “You steal a car and I’ll smother you in your sleep.”

Frank trying to weasel some cash out of Sheila:

F: “I know a guy who sells cars, why don’t you give me the money, I’ll find her something nice.”

S: “Maybe a Volvo? I heard those are real safe…”

Steve to Fiona, on why he can’t just turn himself in:

“Look at me … I can’t go to jail, I might as well wear heals.”

Steve’s final pitch:

“Come with me Fiona. How long is it going to be about them and not about you? When are you finally going to do something for yourself? … Liam’s two – sixteen more years until he’s out of the house … you’ll be what? 37? 38? And who says Frank’s done dumping babies in your lap to raise? You deserve a life of your own.”

Lip afterwards:

“He’s right … you should go Fiona, you’ve done more than enough – we’ll be alright.”

Frank:

“It’s like the moon orbiting the Earth. These things show up and you know you shouldn’t, but then you do and then you don’t know what to do … but we can’t hold it against her, she’s young and carefree. I mean, we’re the victims here, you and me.”

He continues:

“The bible says, it is blessed to forgive son, and that forgiveness is the first step on the stairway to heaven.”

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 12: Re-Cap

Twelve weeks ago, I sat down to check out the premiere of a new show called Shameless. While I had never watched the British version, I was curious to see this show. At first look, Shameless seemed a little racy, a little rough, and most of all, very real. Throughout season one, Shameless has lived up to the billing. Heck, in the pilot alone how much booze, drugs, sex, and stealing did we see? Yeah, there will be people who don’t want to watch that and that’s their right, but you know what? That’s real life – all that stuff really happens, and it’s not necessarily the end of the world when it does. The Gallagher’s, just like everyone else, are trying to do enough to get by, while making sure to have some fun along the way. The Gallagher’s aren’t perfect, far from it, but who is? There wasn’t one character we met on the show this season who had anything I would describe as close to a perfect life, but they all find their own way to get by to make things work; they all find strength and as a result, some sort of happiness.  As Frank said in the open of the pilot episode, “We may not have much, but all of us to a man, knows the most important thing in this life … we know how to fuckin’ party.”

There wasn’t one weak episode all season long, the finale included. Finales can be tough to put together, because viewers want answers, but you can’t give viewers all the answers or there would be nothing to build next season off of. But the writers pulled this week’s episode off perfectly. We begin with Frank, whose conscience flashed this week when he woke up in the Jackson’s basement realizing what had happened between him and Karen the night before. It was a little creepy, I think even Frank would admit that. Not only, was she a minor, not only did she record the act, but she also has a close relationship with Frank’s eldest son, Lip.

Much of the finale revolves around the aftermath of that incident. Karen sends the video off to Eddie and everyone else with the misleading title, “Father of the Year.” Soon after, everyone on the South Side had seen the video from Eddie to his co-workers to other neighbors. In fact, Lip was one of the last to hear of it, but when he found out he was none too happy, this was of course after Karen broke things off earlier in the episode – now he knew why. To make things worse, around the same time, Lip came to the realization that he was actually falling in love with Karen – something he wasn’t sure what to make of. There was more fallout from the video as Eddie chased Frank around, before ultimately committing suicide in the season’s lowest moment. While Frank didn’t try to kill himself, Lip tried to kill him, ironically, with a car he had stolen. Lip didn’t run down Frank, instead crashing the car, but he got a few good jabs at his father before Kev stepped in to break things up.

The other major storyline revolved around Steve, Fiona, and Tony – the awkward love triangle of the season. We left off with Lip and Ian behind bars in episode 11, thanks to Tony who thought he was getting Steve five years in prison. Instead, what Tony got was a detective who wasn’t going to budge easily, ultimately Tony was forced to give up his Bears tickets (pre-season and playoffs included) to get Lip and Ian off. After the fact, Steve, not knowing Lip and Ian were out of prison already, offered Tony his newly purchased house, which he wouldn’t be needing as he planned on following Tony’s orders and taking off to Costa Rica the next day.

Steve of course, wasn’t going to flee the country without returning to the Gallagher house first and dropping off a ticket for Fiona to join him. Fiona, you can see is feeling conflicted and much like Lip’s realization, Fiona realizes that she’s falling in love also. After Steve leaves, one of the most poignant moments of the entire season takes place when Lip walks into the room in the dead of night and tells Fiona that it’s alright and that she should go off with Steve. V tells her the same thing the next day, more in typical V fashion, not quite in the same heartfelt way Lip delivered his message.

We end the episode with Fiona packing her bag, heading off to the train station, Steve waiting at the O’Hare Terminal, and finally Fiona turning around and heading back to the South Side to stay.  In the end, I feel like Fiona just couldn’t leave those kids, if she did how could she say she’s any different than Monica? She’s a hood girl who is deadly loyal to her family, and not even a guy she has fallen hard for can lure her away to the comfortable beaches of Costa Rica – that’s just not who she is. That’s not who the Gallagher’s are, they don’t need white sand beaches to have a good time and party – they have each other.

Other Observations:

• I really thought Fiona was leaving for a few minutes there…
• I’m not sure if that’s how it went down, but supposedly Fiona did follow through and leave the family on the British version of Shameless
• While I know Fiona used the excuse that she could finally make some steady money at Hal’s accounting office, that wasn’t the reason she stayed, you could see it on her face at the train station, she couldn’t leave the kids behind
• I guess this becomes the first cliffhanger of season 2, is Steve a goner? Does he return and if he does, will Fiona take him back?
• Curious to see what dynamic Tony moving in next-door will play?
• Curious if Steve’s mother ever got in touch him after Debbie returned to the Lischman household and spilled the beans
• By the way, at the end of day, I’m still Team Steve, I can’t warm to Tony
• Another major storyline this season took an interesting twist as Ian came out to Fiona, who then replied that she already knew … how?
• Sheila has made it 13 steps out of the house, can’t wait to see what kind of progress she’s made when next season begins!
• Oh Sheila, you’re really going to believe Lip kicked the shit out of Frank over $40?
• The last scene was priceless, and Frank deserved every last drop
• Ok, I think that’s it, how long until Season 2, Episode 1???

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 11: Top Lines

Debs walking in on Fiona singing the national anthem with her leg behind her head:

D: “Am I going to have to learn how to do that when I start having sex?”

F: “This has nothing to do with sex.”

D: “Then it’s even weirder...”

Fiona and the “Snob Mob” moms:

Moms: “Must be nice not to own a home and have to deal with stuff”

Fiona: “Yeah, gives me more time to buy drugs and fence stolen goods.”

Frank singing a little tune:

“I’m getting some cash today … I don’t care what you say … Just stay the fuck out of my way…”

An ironic question coming from Debbie and Carl’s father:

“Shouldn’t someone be watching you?”

Jasmine and Fiona:

J: “How about we go grab some coffee?”

F: “I don’t do coffee.”

J: “Tea?”

F: “No, I mean, I do coffee – I just don’t have the luxury of doing it in the middle of the day like you people.”

Carl staring at Frank:

F: “What?”

C: “I’ve never seen you use deodorant before.”

F: “You should come with me?”

C: “Why?”

F: “It’s time you learn the family business son.”

Frank reading the resume Debs typed him up:

“A passionate professional who brings creative solution from the idea phase to fruition … you know me so well.”

Lip and Ian on his potential biological father:

I: "Look, he’s going to be a douchebag, no matter who he is.”

L: “He can’t be any worse than Frank.”

I: “He’s a Gallagher...”

L: “Maybe he'll take you to a game or you know, kick in some scratch for college, or give you a kidney. Hell, a birthday card once a year - that's a win, right?"

Carl making a move on a fellow pre-teen:

Carl: “Wanna go out sometime?”

Girl: “I’m only 12.”

Carl: “It’s cool, I’m into older women.”

Debs and Frank:

D: “I don’t like your getting hurt on purpose to make money – isn’t that cheating?”

F: “I prefer to think of it as helping”

D: “You do?”

F: “Yeah, when I collect workman’s comp. some lady has to fill out the paperwork that’s her job – if it wasn’t for me she’d be unemployed.”

Ian and Lip:

I: “So why is it we’ve never met any of Frank’s brothers?”

L: “Family reunions are for families.”

Debs to Steve:

“It’s unnatural for a kid to hold a secret for so long … I’m gonna crack.”

Frank and his new “work buddy”:

Frank: “How did Lorenzo get the Big E?”

Buddy: “Inhaling chemical fumes.”

Frank: “That’s all it took?”

Lip looking at an old family photo album of Clayton’s:

“Wow, Frank around the communion wine – that must have been quite a challenge.”

Ian confronting Lip:

I: “This is about you, alright? Not me … Look, we all have our problems with Frank, but he’s still my father and Fiona’s my sister, and you’re my brother. Debbie, Carl, Liam … we’re a family.”

L: “But Ian, you could have a sweet life here.”

I: “I’m happy with who we are – even if your not.”

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 11: Re-Cap

It was a busy hour on Shameless this week, not only did we get to meet four new characters – including three new Gallagher’s, but also a familiar face filled the villain role left open by the departure of Monica late in last week’s episode. That’s not all either, Frank got a job while Karen isn’t doing what I would describe as fine, after the Purity Ball meltdown. And oh yeah, two Gallagher’s were arrested.

After last week’s bombshell that Frank is not Ian’s biological father, Lip and Ian (Mostly Lip), made it their mission to find out which of Frank’s three brothers is Ian’s actual father. Not surprisingly, the Gallagher’s don’t really do family reunions (add it to the list) so the boys have never met any of their uncles. In fact, in order to find out their names Ian and Lip had to go visit Grandma. Silly me, I was thinking Ian and Lip were going to go over their Grandmother’s little cottage house, where she would have warm cookies waiting on the table. I should have known better, turns out Grandma Gallagher is in the clinker, and has been since her meth lab exploded.

The boys get their info in exchange for a weekly pack of cigarettes and they go off in search of Ian’s father. The duo skips Wyatt who lost his testicles in the Navy, how we don’t and we don’t care to know. Instead the boys start with Jerry Gallagher who may or may not be Frank’s twin, but what we know is that he has a shotgun and he wants nothing to do with anything having to do with Frank, including his kids. Lip and Ian move on to Clayton, who seems to have an amazingly suburban life when you consider he’s a Gallagher. He lives in a beautiful neighborhood, he has an enormous house, he’s a bit on the religious side – and he’s looks exactly like Ian. It was the elephant in the room, everyone could tell, including Clayton’s wife who was none too happy, figuring out that yes, he had indeed slept with Monica even though he had previously promised otherwise.

Ian quickly takes off at the first chance he gets which leads to a dynamic scene between the two brothers, which gives us a side of Ian we hadn’t really seen. Ian previously seemed like the most detached Gallagher, the Gallagher who was the exception, the outlier – the one who wants to do his own thing. He may have had that opportunity, but he wanted no part of it on this day.

The fallout from Monica continued this week as Fiona had to go help make decorations for the St. Paddy’s Day party Debbie’s class would be having. While Fiona in the past had shied away from such events due to the “snob mob” mothers, however this time around Fiona was befriended by a mother named Jasmine Hollander. What followed were kisses on the lips, a potential job, free coffee, free clothes and an offer of doing something in the bathroom – exactly what was a little murky …

That’s because Fiona got a call just after Jasmine’s strange offer, with news that Lip and Ian had been arrested for stealing a car. It all goes back to Tony, who early on in the episode figured out what Steve was up to. Tony followed Steve, confronted him, knocked the crap out of him and then gave him an ultimatum – turn yourself in or leave town unannounced. While we assume Steve chose the latter, we aren’t sure yet. Tony thought Steve defied him though, as minutes after the back alley confrontation Steve’s stolen cayenne went flying by officer Tony, he called it in and when he caught up to the vehicle, he was surprise to see Lip and Ian standing there with handcuffs on. I don’t think that went the way Tony was hoping it would.

Finally, to put it short and sweet – Karen is having a bit of a break down. Well, actually a larger breakdown. She started her own freaky online video diary, she tattooed the word ‘whore’ to her arm, she died her hair black, and she has some type of fancy nose ring. It was also a rough episode for Frank who was dealt a hard blow this episode when his workers comp. was terminated. This meant Frank had to go out and find the most dangerous job he could. It took a while, but eventually Frank was successful and found a job where he had the opportunity to stick a drill through his hand. After taking a handful (or two) of “Oxy”, Frank went downstairs and let’s just say, things quickly got illegal and strange between Frank and Karen – we haven’t seen the last of that video, unfortunately.

Other Observations:

• No Sheila this week L
• I’m pretty positive we’ll never be getting that family reunion
• Why did I ever think Grandma Gallagher wouldn’t be in prison? That would defy gravity
• Karma’s a bitch, Tony!
• Loved Frank’s new “Work friend”, kind of wished that went on a little longer, would have added an interesting dynamic – maybe he’ll have to go back once the hand is healed
• Debs is getting some good stuff out of this whole “Jimmy” thing, I’d keep the piehole shut
• No idea what to make of Jasmine…
• Is that really what soccer moms talk about? Refinancing?
• I love that we seemingly learn a new tidbit about the patriarch of the Gallagher family every episode, this week is that his nickname as a child was, “Father Frank” because he was first in his catechism class, who would have thunk?
• Season finale next week, big things are gonna pop, I can feel it – don’t miss it!

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 10: Top Lines

Lip:

“Congratulations Mom, you always knew how to pick ‘em!”

More Lip:

“Next time you’re thinking about dropping in, don’t – you’ve fucked up our lives enough already.”

Frank making some sense:

Bob: “Monica needs to know the kids aren’t gonna hate her.”

Frank: “It’s too late – they already hate her!”

Mandy and Ian:

M: “Kash had better move his family back to Baghdad before Mickey gets out”

I: “He’s from Evanston …”

Tony to Fiona, after learning Steve bought the house next door:

“Hope he can get the smell out … Harris was dead on the toilet a long time before we found him.”

Frank back to not making sense:

Frank: “The boy needs to be with his mother”

Fiona: “He is with his mother … until she decides to take off again”

Frank on Sheila:

“She’s like mouth herpes – the gift that keeps on giving”

Kev:

“Two lesbians at home and the promise of cash? Maybe your luck has changed Frank.”

V helping Fiona find a lawyer:

“What about the lady who helped get Debbie and Carl back after Frank locked them in the car at Indian Bingo?”

The lawyer’s office:

Lawyer: “You have a case?”

Fiona: “I have a folder”

Lawyer: “…. You’re father, Frank Gallagher – wow, he’s a live one.”

Lip and Ian on the DNA tests:

L: “It’s actually pretty cool, there’s a lot of shit we can figure out about ourselves in here.”

I: “Yeah, like if we got the alcoholic gene from Frank.”

L: “Yeah the dumb gene from Monica.”

I: “Or if any of us are going to turn out to be gay.”

Ian talking to Mickey in prison:

I: “Uh, I miss you.”

M: “You say that again, I’ll rip your tongue out of your head.”

Fiona breaking the news to Frank:

Fiona: “Congratualtions, you’re still the father.”

Frank: “Oooh, I thought that was always just a rumor about Nana Gallgher having an affair with that sax player.”

One of Frank’s reasons why Monica will be back:

“Or penis grief … that’s when you wake-up in the middle of the night and say ‘somebody help me, I just fucked a lady”

Monica:

“Fiona you’re mad, I was married to Frank for 18 years, it’s like swallowing broken glass everyday – I get it”

Monica on who Ian’s father is:

M: “Honestly sweetie, I don’t know – there was that week in ’95 where I did a lot of pcp…”

Frank: “You did pcp? Without me? You promised we would do that together!”

Lip:

“I like the idea of Monica cheating on Frank, it really keeps my image of you right on track mom”

Carl and Debs:

C: “How can two ladies get married?”

D: ‘They’re lesbians …”

Fiona:

“If you love any of us in anyway, you’ll leave Liam, take your girlfriend, get in your truck, and never come back.”

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 10: Re-Cap

Well, it took a little longer than we I hoped for, but Monica is gone and thankfully she took “Bob” with her. We pick up episode 10 pretty much where we left off last week. Fiona is at Steve’s new pad, which is within an ear shot of the Gallagher home which makes things that much worse for Fiona as she can see Monica fail through the windows, rather than just imagine how she’s screwing up. While they don’t have a couch – Fiona does have a monitoring system set-up in Debs room where she instructs Debbie and Carl it’s time for bed.

 

Lip and Ian who each had really strong episodes this week, overheard Bob and Monica’s plan – even though it’s clear Bob is pulling the strings and Monica is the “Yes-girl” in the relationship. Bob and Monica swabbed Liam and dropped off his DNA sample in hopes of proving that he wasn’t Frank’s and that they could freely take him. In the meantime, the kids were stuck with Monica, while Fiona was stuck couch shopping with a new iPhone in her pocket that Steve gave her.

While I’m not sure whether I like Monica or Bob less, or hate them both equally – one positive if you can call it that, about Bob is that she has no interest in sticking around and she pretty much convinced Monica to leave, even though “flaky” Monica, as Fiona described her accurately thinks the kids “need her.” No, Monica – not only do they not need you, they don’t want you. Monica seems to be living in a bit of a delusional world.

While Lip doesn’t sucker punch Monica like he does to his father on occasion, including this episode – he on multiple occasions gave her a verbal slap in the face. He certainly isn’t “Broken-hearted” like Monica thinks. Meanwhile, Ian wants absolutely nothing to do with his mother, he seems to have a hard time just looking at her. Carl and Debs also cooled off on showing any sort of forgiveness to their mother this episode, kind of realizing that things are better with Fiona.   

Lip and Ian, both fiercely loyal are not letting Bob and Monica get away with taking Liam. They follow them, in a sweet Mercedes Steve let Lip borrow, and wait outside as Bob and Monica go in to pick-up the results. Lip and Ian know how things turned out when Bob comes out fuming – you would think she knew Liam more than like 48 hours the way she was going off. Here’s an idea – if you want to start a family so bad why don’t you do that? Adopt a baby who needs a home, don’t steal one from your former family – just a thought, there!

Monica called a family dinner for some reason, I don’t know maybe so she could fight with Frank more? Lip and Fiona confront Bob and Monica saying they know the paternity results, and reiterate that especially now, there is no way they’re leaving with baby Liam. As for those other paternity results, while Liam is Frank’s we found out Ian isn’t, but that most likely he is the son of one Frank’s brothers, which means … and just when you thought Monica couldn’t dip any lower.

In the end, Monica and Bob leave sans Liam in a very emotional final scene, where Fiona didn’t say anything to her mother, but she didn’t have to. 

Monica and Bob aside, plenty else happened this week too, including the demise of the clown paraphernalia (I’ve been waiting a long time for that!) It was the big night as Eddie and Karen went off to the purity ball, which turned out to be even stranger than I imagined it would. It started off fine and all, until it was Karen’s turn to list her “transgressions.” That of course led to more than a couple of dropped jaws and Eddie calling his daughter out as a whore. Besides Karen taking out the clowns, Sheila was so pissed at Eddie she chased him right out of the house. Tony the cop reappeared this week as well and it was Fiona who broke the news to him that Steve would be a neighborhood fixture. Tony then apparently drove around town in search of Steve to congratulate him and tell him Fiona’s a “Good girl” – thanks there, Tony!

Other Observations:

• This is the second time in three episodes that Sheila has left the house, are her days as an agoraphobic almost over?
• No mention of the Steve/Jimmy storyline this week, how long can Debs keep quiet for?
• I really hope we don’t see Monica and Bob again … but that’s unlikely
• Hopefully we get to meet Frank’s brothers at some point, very curious to see what they’re like
• How bad do you feel for Ian? When he told Lip he had a lot going on he meant it, and that was before the paternity results came in…
• One of my favorite things about this episode is that we got a large look at that bond between Lip and Ian, they’re so open and comfortable with each other, they have a really special trust and really do tell each other everything …
• How awkward is Tony the cop? Every conversation he has in uncomfortable – it’s like, dude Fiona isn’t into you, get over it
• This week’s most Shameless behavior award goes to Frank for setting up “The accident” … even though it hurt, I bet there was a part of Carl that liked it
• The Ian and Mickey scene was really well done I thought, you can tell Mickey isn’t all tough like he portrays, he’s a real interesting character, hopefully he doesn’t beat the Jello stealer into submission and gets out soon
• Well, it’s pretty clear Monica’s easily impressionable, she did the right thing … it was a rough two weeks but in the end all is right again in the Gallagher house
• My only concern – do we think maybe, just maybe Frank and Monica are still attracted to each other?

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 9: Top Lines

V and Debs in front of what Debs believes is Candice’s home:

D: “K, you got to promise.”

V: “Ok, I promise, I won’t tell Fiona – now whose house is this?”

D: “Not sure.”

More from that conversation:

V: “Fiona’s a big girl.”

D: “Fiona takes care of everyone, but no one takes care of Fiona.”

“Steve” discussing his family with Fiona:

“Not much to say, they live in Michigan.”

Fiona, after “Steve” lies and tells her that his father worked in a GM plant:

”Family business? He builds them, you steal them”

Eddie explaining why it’s his fault Karen has gone down the wrong path:

“If you leave a dog in the house for more than 8 hours alone you can’t get mad at him for peeing on the rug, right?”

Fiona to Steve:

“Got to bring Liam to the clinic for some shots … don’t tell Jenny McCarthy.”

Steve after hearing Fiona call Liam Baby bottom:

“I thought I was baby bottoms? No I said you HAVE a baby bottom.”

Debs and the library kid, who is crushing big time on her:

Kid: “I’ve got a signed first edition of Harry Potter”

Debs: “Overrated, they made a better movie than a book and now with all those kid actors grown-up they’re scarier looking than the villians.”

Sheila to the Eddie’s bible study group:

S: “Eddie is in the basement, he’ll be right up, and of course you’ll all get your shoes back when you go so don’t worry.”

Member: “It’d be great if mine came back shined!”

(Cheesy laughs)

Eddie to his bible study group:

“Sorry folks, had a little plumbing issue, the house’s not mine”

(More cheesy laughs)

Steve making sure Lip can work with him:

S: “You’ve got a drivers license, right?”

L: “Yeah, two of them”

Debs to Mrs. Lishman:

D: “Are you screwing my sisters boyfriend?”

Mrs. L: “If you’re selling cookies that’s a hell of an opening line.”

Sheila after calling Monica:

“How can you not know who two of Chicago’s weathermen are? What kind of person is this Monica?”

Steve explaining his family to Debs:

“I was raised by a pack of wolves, just like you were – only my wolves went to Harvard”

Debs to Steve or “Jimmy”:

“Sifter sifts, rolling pin rolls – nice when things do what they say they will.”

Sheila to Debs:

“You Gallagher’s – you’re all so funny!”

Lip catching Ian up on what he missed:

“You know how Dad’s a total fucking asshole? Turns out he’s the good one.”

Fiona to Monica:

“You don’t get to abandon your kids and show up one day to get your pick of the litter.”

She continues on …

“This is about you – what you didn’t do. It’s about what I did, and you know what? I did a fucking great job!”

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 9: Re-Cap

I’ve got a problem, I admit it right here, right now. You know you’ve become way too attached to a show when a scripted series of events pisses you off so much that you lose sleep after watching an episode. For me, that was last night, yes, I lost some sleep over Shameless. I suppose we can blame Frank Gallagher for getting us in this whole mess, but after this episode I have a little bit of a different outlook on him than I did before, more on that in a minute.

Tonight Frank, with assistance from Sheila and Kev, two unknowingly accomplices, introduced us to the mother of the Gallagher kids, Monica (Chloe Webb). Frank needed Monica to sign something so he could get another disability check after apparently getting his foot caught in a train – on a side note, if you get your foot stuck in a train the government should be taking money from you, not giving you money. I digress, long story somewhat short, Frank tricked Monica into showing up at a supermarket thinking she won a giant teddy bear and a one-hundred dollar cash prize. Little did Frank know, Monica would show up with her new partner, Bob (who is not a man, but a big black woman).

Frank initially got away thanks to some sweet moves behind the wheel from Kev, but the ladies followed in pursuit and tracked Frank down at Sheila’s, where Debs happened to be taking a cooking lesson from Julia Child oops, I meant Sheila. Debs ran out once she saw her mother pushing her out of the way and heading home to tell her siblings what was going on down the block. This led to all the siblings (plus V) heading over to the house, except one notable exception.

I felt horrible for all six Gallagher children in this episode, let’s face it – they put up with a lot of shit daily, but this was a whole other level. Ian seemed to take the news the worst, running straight to the Malkovich house telling Mickey he had nowhere else to go. Mickey had buddies over and told Ian he would meet him at the Kash and Grab in 20 minutes. Mickey showed, they headed to the backroom and then who walks in the back door but Kash. Mickey takes off, only to return minutes later to make sure Kash would be keeping his lips sealed about what he saw. Then, in typical Mickey fashion, he grabbed a Snickers bar without paying, at which point Kash, who apparently had been practicing his marksmanship, shot a bullet through Mickey’s leg.

Back though to the Monica saga. Once the kids showed up, including Ian because he really had nowhere to go after the shooting you could see a clear divide. The eldest three Gallagher kids, Lip, Ian, and Fiona wanted absolutely nothing to do with Monica, while Carl and Debs, who initially pushed Monica away were more impressionable and gave in, similar to last week’s episode with sober Frank. Then there is the youngest Gallagher, Liam. Monica and Bob announce their intention to Liam with them – this sets Lip and Fiona off. Things get atomic and Fiona heads out.

While yes, this whole mess was caused by Frank and if the price was right, he apparently would let Liam leave with Monica and Bob, I have a newfound appreciation and a bit of a different outlook on Frank than I did after the previous eight episodes. Say whatever you want about him, we all know he has his share of flaws but so do all the Gallagher’s and everyone for that matter. But you know what? Frank didn’t bail – he stuck around – and while he may not be around much the family still has a father and I do believe the three older children respect that about him, maybe nothing else, but I do think they are appreciative of that.

There’s no way the elder three are going to ever be able to live with Monica, no chance – I have a hard time seeing Carl or especially Debs who out of all the Gallagher’s probably sticks up for Fiona the most, as evidenced in this episode, live without their sister who has done so much for them. Once they realized Fiona was out, I’m pretty sure it hit them. I doubt Monica sticks around anyways, I sure hope she doesn’t that’s for sure – she might be their biological mother, but one thing is for sure – she is not a Gallagher. A Gallagher would not turn their back and desert their family. Final thing, as for the Liam issue, no way Monica should have any right to take Liam after she skipped out when he was two months old. After seeing that entire display over the final ten minutes of tonight’s episode, I have even more respect for Fiona and all she’s done. As Debs and Carl leaned in to hug the woman who gave birth to them, not their mother – that’s Fiona – you could see the pain on the faces of Ian, Lip, and Fiona. Not only did you see that pain, but you could feel it.

Quickly, the other major storyline of the episode revolved around that guy Fiona’s dating – Steve, Jimmy, whatever you want to call him. Scrappy Debbie after some research, showed up at his parents house and got quite a bit of good information from Ms. D-Lish. Turns out Jimmy’s family believes not only that he’s studying at the University of Michigan, which we learned last week – they also think he’s at the top of his class at the University’s medical school. In order to get the underestimated Debs to keep quiet Jimmy gets her a few gifts and lets her in on another big secret … he bought the house next door from the Gallagher’s.

Other Observations:

• Honestly, a lot of the earlier parts of the episode went out the window, the last ten minutes were the most compelling, heart-wrenching, emotional minutes of the season
• I really can’t wait for Monica to leave, and Bob? How obnoxious is she?
• In Kev and V news, Jonah, the son of Ethel came for a visit this week and Kev has shown an interest in adding Jonah as a foster kid too, don’t think V is particularly keen on the idea
• Interesting to see what comes out of the Kash-Mickey shooting
• Haven’t mentioned it as much as the other relationships on the show, but I get the feeling Karen wants something more and Lip is totally happy staying on the friends with benefits route
• I wrote it above, but I seriously underestimated the ability of Debs to get to the bottom of this Steve thing, don’t lie you did too!
• Eddie’s bible study looks like a crazy group…
• It happened with the goons two weeks ago, then again this week with Monica and Bob, no matter the tension in the room everyone always complies with Sheila’s request and takes their shoes off … kind of turning into a running joke
• I think that’s it, I must have forgotten something, if you have made it all the way down here to word 1211 congrats, you must have the same unhealthy addiction to Shameless I do!
• Hopefully Monica leaves next week and as a result this post will be back to its normal length … if not there may not be a post, I may just combust, we’ll see I guess 

Shameless: Season 1, Episode 8: Top Lines

Frank upon learning he was unconscious for 2 days:

“That’s nothing, back in ’95 I was out for 8 days …”

The Doctor and Frank:

Dr: “In my career I’ve never seen such a spectacular display on alcoholism.”

F: “Thank you.”

Dr: “Would you be able to abstain from using alcohol for 2 weeks?”

F: “No.”

Dr: “We could offer you three thousand dollars.”

F: “Yes.”

Kev to the social worker:

“Religious sect? Like a cult?”

Frank in his return to the Alibi Room:

“I’m sober as a 7-year-old, haven’t had a drink in two days … well granted I’ve been unconscious for most of it.”

Frank continues:

“I figured if I can abstain from alcohol while I’m out, how hard can it be to do when I’m awake?”

And finally he asks of his fellow patrons:

“I’d like you all to not drink too – in solidarity – like school children when shave their head for the cancer kid.”

Kev and Ethel:

E: “I haven’t done my chores today.”

K: “Como se huh?”

The professor on Lip’s excuse of not wanting to deal with loans if he goes to college:

“You’re a clever kid, you’ll find a way to stiff Uncle Sam.”

The professor’s parting advice:

“Wear a condom Phillip.”

Frank after trying Debbie’s Hawaiian Punch:

F: “It’s so good, why is it so good?”

D: “It’s all sugar.”

F: “Can we get more of this?”

Fiona and Lip:

F: “Kev and V are on their way over with meat sauce.”

L: “Is that a euphemism?”

Lip and Carl:

C: “Paintball rocks, I had the best day of my life!”

L: “Did you wear a faceguard?”

C: “Nope!”

An only-sober Frank moment:

Lip: “Well, drunk or sober you’re still an asshole.”

Debs: “Lip.”

Frank: “It’s ok Deb, everybody’s got a right to his own opinion that’s what makes this country of ours so great.”

Kev and Ethel:

K: “Listen, I know the bible says you get closer to God and crap if you sew the holes in my socks, but this is wrong, it’s Saturday and in my house the way to get closer to God on Saturday is to play.”

E: “Is that in Ezekiel?”

K: “Yeah, the updated version.”

Debs to Lip:

“We have to kill the turtle.”

Fiona’s instructions to Carl, put in charge of cutting off Franks alcohol monitor:

“Just bracelet, no bone.”